Friday, January 30, 2009

shit

you make me feel like shit.
and i'm sure that i'll get over this fucking business and i'll love you again in a few days.
i don't fucking know what this is
or why i feel like this
i shouldn't you don't belong to me.
i wish you did.

i relapsed tonight
i did something that i make fun of people for doing
and i'm an asshole yes,
but it felt so good.

i wish that my life would be simple again.
i want it to go back to normal

right now i feel like i might be dying,
and i'm completely alright with that.
i'm not even going to lie.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

you make me feel

so weird
and i love you.
and you're everything that's bad for me.
and i don't know anymore

aside from you, i feel as if my life isn't right anymore.
there's something missing

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

i love you so much that it hurts my head

.... i said don't mind you under my skin. i'll let the bad parts in, the bad parts in.

i miss you and my head hurts. you make me think of things that i've never had to think about before. and i don't know whether it's a good thing or it's a bad thing. i just want everything to be okay. i don't want to love you as much as i do. i wish i didn't have to worry about stupid things like this. i wish you didn't have this effect on me. i just need to spend time with you. a lot of time.

and i want to be able to help everyone who feels badly about anything. i don't want anyone to hurt. is that too much to ask? every person on this planet is put here for a reason, and they are a wonderful person. don't let anyone tell you otherwise. ever.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

dear lord

i miss you a hell of a lot
i need to physically be with you
i think i'm in love with you
fuck

Friday, January 23, 2009

across the .. country

i want to go on a road trip with you.
it would be fun
we could live in the car.
and we wouldnt have to worry about anything
and we could stop and make memories in weird places. and visit weird places.

oh that would be fun. very much fun.

lets go sometime

Monday, January 19, 2009

blah

i feel like i'm not even here
it feels weird
and not good

like i'm barely living?
yeah

Friday, January 16, 2009

my entire world

is crashing under my feet.
i can't control it, and i don't know why it's happening.
i need someone to help me out of it.

Monday, January 12, 2009

you.

i don't know where i'm supposed to be, but i feel that you're part of it. i've never felt this way before ever. and it's completely new and weird, and i don't fully understand it. i know that i can't really do much about it. except for try and stick it out. which may be hard, it may be easy. nothing is ever easy in my life though. i fell very hard for you, harder than i've fallen in my life. i'm down on the ground waiting for you to come around. i hate the way you play games with me, but i don't think you know what you're doing. i want a solid person in my life. i don't want someone who will lie to me. i don't want to have to lie to them, i want to be honestly myself. i want someone who will sit with me and just hold me when i need it. someone who cares. i know that you care, but how much? what's your limit on showing affection to me? do you care enough?

mer.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

i wish everything would go back to normal.
i miss being like everyone else.

i want you to talk to me when i need to hear you.

Monday, January 5, 2009

i. wish. i. knew.

i wish i knew why you fucking do this to me
every single time it happens, i say i dont get it.
but i let it happen again
and again

you talk to me like you're never gonna talk to me again
and then you drop me for days at a time
you don't answer or anything

i dont understand you
im honestly sitting here wanting to cry
i dont know what i want from you. i just want you

Sunday, January 4, 2009

there’s not a siren that can keep me from your window. there's not a pill that could keep you from my mind...

i dont know what you do to me or how you do it.
but you do.
you make me feel so .. different
i love it
and i hate it.
i wish i knew that you could be there for me like i want you to be.
i want us to sleep in the same bed.
not for any reason, just to be next to you
all i want is to be next to you.
to feel that you're there.
and you might want the same
you might not.
i don't know
you're gonna have to let me know
because you're one of the only people that i can't decode
and i can't stand that
i never know what you're thinking or why you're thinking it.

i want to get inside your head and stay there. forever.
i don't want to slip from your mind. ever.